All my life I have been somewhat of a loner. I do have friends and family, but I appreciate my alone time. Too often we avoid periods of solitude. We shun this mainly because we are scared of what we may discover about ourselves.

But time alone is necessary for developing self-trust. Trusting myself was something I wasn’t great at. Yet, it’s the foundation of personal growth, decision-making, and emotional resilience.

In this article, I will show you what self-trust is, why solitude is necessary for developing this trait, and how you can get over the fear of spending time alone.

Understanding self-trust

Self-trust refers to the confidence we have in our thoughts, feelings, and decisions. It is the belief that we can rely on ourselves to make choices that align with our values and best interests. This inner trust is crucial for maintaining mental well-being, building healthy relationships, and pursuing personal goals.

For those who suffer from self-esteem issues, self-trust can be hard to do. It was for me. I always sought external validation on most things I did or wanted to try. Notice how I said “most things”. That is a sign that there was some level, albeit a small amount, of self-trust that I had. The same is true for you!

Without self-trust, we may fall prey to self-doubt, indecision, and outside approval. It’s an important quality for emotional health. Individuals with high self-trust are more likely to exhibit resilience and optimism. They also have effective coping mechanisms for dealing with stressful situations.

The role of solitude in building self-trust

Though I spent a lot of time by myself I had very little self-trust. What I didn’t realize in my earlier days that I do now is that solitude fosters self-trust in several ways.

We reflect on our values and beliefs

When we spend time alone, we can examine our values without external influences. This self-reflection helps us understand what truly matters to us, strengthening our ability to make decisions aligned with our core beliefs.

Emotional awareness grows

Solitude provides the space to process emotions and understand their origins. By sitting with our feelings, we learn to trust our emotional responses, which is a cornerstone of self-trust. Research published in the European Journal of Social Psychology highlights that solitude enhances emotional regulation and self-awareness, leading to better mental health outcomes.

Problem-solving skills are enhanced

Without the distractions of social interactions, we can approach problems with a clear mind. This independent problem-solving nurtures confidence in our abilities. One study suggests that solitude improves creative thinking. An article from Harvard Business Review says that time alone is beneficial in strengthening decision-making skills and it provides you with a competitive advantage.

We strengthen our inner voice

Solitude helps us tune into our inner voice, enabling us to distinguish it from external opinions. This practice reinforces your belief in your judgment and intuition. When you regularly engage in introspection you develop higher levels of self-trust and authenticity.

Overcoming the fear of solitude

Many people avoid solitude due to the discomfort it can initially bring. The silence of being alone often amplifies unresolved emotions or self-doubts. However, facing these feelings is essential for growth.

Psychologists suggest gradually increasing time spent alone to build comfort with solitude. Start with small, intentional moments, such as meditating for five minutes or journaling your thoughts. Over time, these practices can transform solitude into a source of strength and self-discovery.

Here are a variety of ways you can cultivate and become comfortable with solitude in your life.

Mindful meditation

This is a powerful tool for developing self-trust. It teaches you to observe your thoughts without judgment, fostering a sense of inner calm and clarity. Every day I spend at least 10 to 20 minutes in mindful meditation. This allows me to center myself and simply be. The more you practice the more you will find that you begin to step out and trust yourself. The doubt and fear that have had you holding back begin to diminish.

Journaling

Writing down your thoughts and feelings can help you process emotions. Journaling serves as a mirror to your inner world, enabling you to build trust in your ability to understand and navigate your emotions. I find that I get a lot of self-revelation and “A-ha” moments that enable me to work through my emotions.

Nature walks

There is something about being in nature. It allows you to connect with this world specially. Also, it enhances the benefits of solitude. A study in Landscape and Urban Planning found that natural environments reduce stress and improve self-reflection.

Creative activities

Engaging in creative pursuits like painting, writing, or playing music allows you to express yourself authentically. This expression reinforces self-trust by validating your unique perspective.

Digital detox

Disconnecting from technology for a designated period can help you focus on your inner thoughts without external distractions. Use this time to reconnect with yourself through activities like reading or mindfulness practices. Taking a break from the digital world is something I do each day, typically at night. It allows me to get in touch with my authentic self and listen to what that part of me has to say.

The psychological benefits of self-trust

Knowing what self-trust is and how to get more of it into your life through your alone time is well and good, but the million-dollar question is: What’s in it for you? Building self-trust through solitude offers profound psychological benefits:

Enhanced self-esteem

Trusting yourself boosts your confidence and belief in your abilities. This is something I experienced in my own life. It was like a godsend for me. Am I where I want to be regarding self-trust in my life? No, I’m not. But, let me tell you one thing, I am miles ahead of where I was several years ago. It’s a daily, weekly, and monthly process.

Improved decision-making

Self-trust reduces indecision and second-guessing, allowing you to make choices with conviction. I mentioned how I would need external reassurance about the decisions I made. Those days are long gone. Now people come to me for decisions. That’s not to be boastful but to show you how things can change in amazing ways in your life.

Resilience

When you trust yourself, you’re better equipped to handle setbacks and challenges. When there was a roadblock in my life I would lament the fact and go into a cycle of “Why me?” Then the towel would be thrown in and I would walk away. With self-trust, you understand that the obstacle is only a temporary delay in what you want to achieve. You stop, re-evaluate, and then push on.

Authenticity

Self-trust fosters a deeper connection to your true self, enabling you to live authentically and align your actions with your values. I think this is the best part of all. You begin to live for yourself. Those around you benefit too because you are operating from a place of understanding, compassion, and empathy.

Some things and some people will drop out of your life. That’s a byproduct of living authentically. But then new people and fresh experiences that align with your values will come your way.

As you can see there are a lot of awesome things that you have to gain when you start to foster self-trust in your life. You and the world around you transform into something exciting and that has you chomping at the bit for more.

Don’t be afraid to be alone

Spending time alone is not a sign of loneliness or social disconnection; it is a profound act of self-care and self-respect. By prioritizing solitude, you create the space to cultivate self-trust, empowering you to navigate life with clarity, confidence, and resilience.

Incorporate moments of solitude into your daily routine and observe how it transforms your relationship with yourself. Remember, the journey to self-trust begins with the simple act of turning inward and embracing the wisdom within. It may be scary at first, but the time and effort result in a bounty of rewards.

 

– Brian Simms