How self-aware are you? I don’t mean on a surface level but in a profound sense of truly being in touch with your thoughts, emotions, and feelings.

Self-awareness was something that I wasn’t great at. To be honest with you, it was a concept that scared me because there was so much buried hurt and pain that I didn’t want to acknowledge and confront.

But life led me to a place where introspection was necessary, and I enjoyed the process. It was my moment of awakening and a path toward self-enlightenment. When I could shine the light inward, it reflected outward, and I could better understand myself and others.

Not a day goes by when I don’t engage in some form of self-reflection and contemplation. Daily reflection is a wonderful means of increasing self-awareness. In this post, I want to show you various ways to become more in touch with your emotions, thoughts, and feelings. When you start to gain such insight, it’s exciting and rewarding because it helps you transform into a better version of yourself.

The power of daily reflection

Daily self-reflection is the process in which you take time out of your schedule and contemplate. You review the things that happened throughout the day, as well as your emotions, experiences, and thoughts you had. For example, are there some emotions you tried to suppress and others you let loose? How did you respond to the events that you encountered? Was it positive or negative? Was your thinking due to pre-programmed conditioning resulting in automatic behaviors and thoughts? What triggers set you off and why?

As you can see, self-reflection can get pretty deep. But as you dig down into the foundations of yourself, you get acute self-understanding. From that, you can get clarity and decide if there are things you want or need to change. Don’t come into this exercise with self-condemnation. That’s not what awareness is about. Treat yourself with love, tenderness, and compassion. Be gentle towards yourself.

Through the journey, you will become less emotionally reactive, gain greater clarity around your goals, and reduce stress. These are aspects that have blossomed in my life. For instance, I can sense when I am getting physically and emotionally tense, which allows me to intervene and do deep breathing and mindfulness to calm myself down. Regarding clear goals, there are ones I have discarded because they don’t align with what I am about. This frees up time and energy (and therefore less stress) to pursue the things that speak to me at a soulish level. There is liberty and joy in that.

How to start a daily reflection practice

If you are keen to begin self-reflection, it does require a degree of dedication. But the effort is truly worth it. Consider it an investment in the most important person in your life…you. The following is how you can establish a daily practice around personal introspection.

Set aside time

Block out a time in your day in which you can merely sit and reflect. This could be in the morning or before you go to bed. If you feel that the thoughts from your self-reflection will affect your ability to fall asleep, then avoid this practice when it’s close to bedtime. I do this several times a day, but that’s due to my mindfulness training.

You don’t need to spend a lot of time in deep contemplation. 5-10 minutes can work wonders as you stop and observe your thoughts, feelings, and reactions. If you want to extend this period of reflection, that’s fine. Go with whatever time frame you are comfortable with, but don’t force yourself to do it. Make this an enjoyable experience.

Find a good environment

Somewhere in which there is noise or distractions isn’t conducive to helping you be still and look within. A peaceful environment allows you to focus inward without any disturbances. That allows you to pay better attention to your thoughts, emotions, and intentions.

Another advantage of immersing yourself in quiet surroundings is that you are better able to relax which enhances a receptive mental state ideal for introspection and reflection. If you don’t have somewhere currently in which you can take time out and be with yourself, I recommend you create such a space as soon as you can. For me, my bedroom is the sanctuary where I can lie down, relax, and be with my thoughts.

Reflection prompts

Okay, you have set aside time and are now sitting in your peaceful environment, and then…a mind blank! What are you supposed to be reflective of? This situation happens to most of us.

Here are some prompts that I use to help me when my brain is struggling for ideas:

  • What am I thankful for today?
  • How could I have reacted differently to so-and-so when they upset me?
  • What emotions did I feel strongly today and why?
  • Where did that thought come from and how accurate was it regarding who I am? Does it sound like me or someone from my past such as parents, caregivers, or peers?
  • How did I respond to challenges and what does that tell me about myself?
  • Did what I do today get me closer to my goals or was it just me pretending to be busy? If it’s the latter, then why was I procrastinating?

Using prompts like these helps you uncover deeper insights about yourself. You are turning over psychological and emotional stones to discover what lies beneath them.

At times it can be uncomfortable and emotionally challenging, especially when you stumble across deep hurts that you have buried in your subconscious for a long time. There have been many times when I have cried to myself because I have come across an emotional scar that I opened up. Don’t avoid the pain that will come up, allow it space and treat it with loving compassion because you will find that there is healing taking place within you.

Journaling

In a lot of my posts, I talk about journaling. That’s because it’s a popular and effective method for self-reflection. To get the most out of journaling it’s best to write down everything without filtering. Set your conscious mind aside and allow the words and information to pour out of you onto the page(s). When you feel like you have bared your soul into your journal entry, stop, reset yourself by closing your eyes and taking several deep cleansing breaths, then read what you have written.

What insights have you gleaned from reading your current entry or past entries? What speaks to you the most and why? What moves you emotionally? Is there anything that surprises you?

Recurring themes

From your journaling and less formal reflective practices are there themes and patterns that crop up consistently? Dissect these and see what’s fueling them. Analyse both the positive and negative patterns.

Look at whether it’s healthy habitual behavior or something maladaptive. What feelings, thoughts, and emotions are behind the patterns? Are they something you want to continue within your life or stop? How can you put an end to those themes that no longer serve you?

A recurring theme in my own life was self-deprecation. That was due to my low self-esteem which caused me to put myself down whenever I failed at something. Also, there were patterns of self-sabotage that stemmed from a lack of self-confidence. Through self-reflection, I came to understand the source of my patterns and made changes in my thinking, my self-view, and my behaviors.

Getting to know you

Through reflection, you develop an increased awareness about who you are and what makes you tick from a mental and emotional perspective. This knowledge serves to help you grow and develop as a person.

For me, it has allowed me to become a more holistic individual who is better able to understand the world around me and interact with others (and myself) at a more empathetic level.

Start the journey to self-awareness slowly. Maybe you want to begin with journaling or perhaps mindfulness or meditation pique your interest. Whichever way you choose to approach self-reflection, take your time and feel your way into the practice.

Self-awareness is a lifelong process, but don’t let that discourage you. You will find that your quality of life improves and your personal growth is amazing. I am so addicted to this kind of insight that it has become ingrained into my life. I highly recommend you do the same. It’s an incredible experience that makes each day an adventure.

It’s time for you to get to know you.

 

 – Brian Simms