I loved to remain within my comfort zone. It was cozy, predictable… and safe. Then, in an unexpected twist, I uprooted from the country I grew up in, left a job that I had for  6 years, and relocated overseas to a completely different culture and language. My comfort zone had been eradicated.

Safe zones in our lives provide us with something familiar, nonthreatening, and easy. However, there is no personal growth in such a place. In my case, I had to learn to adapt, change, and face psychological issues that I had buried away. The transformation has been both challenging and exciting.

Embracing uncertainty isn’t comfortable. It can be scary and, at times, terrifying. However, unpredictability is necessary for your growth and self-discovery. You learn the most about yourself – your strengths, values, and potential through it. Each step outside your comfort zone takes you closer to becoming a more capable and self-aware version of yourself.

In this article, we will look at how to break out of your comfort zone by reframing fear, taking calculated risks, cultivating mindfulness to help you maintain emotional resilience, finding the proper support, and celebrating your progress. These five invaluable skills allow you to begin your journey towards self-growth and empowerment.

1. Change your view on fear

How often have you taken fear as a signal to stop, to walk away from the situation that is threatening you? That had been my default setting. It’s so much easier to turn and run, but that doesn’t help change who you are. It merely keeps you in the same lifestyle, you remain the same person, and everything stays…the same!

Yet, fear can be seen as an indicator that you are standing on the edge of a growth opportunity. Sure, the land that lies in front of you is uncharted territory that has you doubting yourself, but that is also exciting. You get to explore a whole new world and face challenges that matter. It’s a time to go forward, and expand yourself rather than retreat into your comfort zone.

Consider the moment when fear arises within and ask yourself:

  • What am I afraid of?
  • What’s the worst-case scenario?
  • What’s the best possible outcome?

Too often we highlight the negatives and then come up with a bunch of excuses as to why we don’t want to try something new. Something I had down to a fine art! But, you need to change your perspective and shine the spotlight on the positives. How will this novel situation help me learn things about myself? Through this self-analysis, you turn the fear into a manageable challenge rather than an overwhelming obstacle.

I was afraid of public speaking. Standing in front of a bunch of strangers and giving a presentation scared the hell out of me. Then, one day, a work colleague asked me if I wanted to audition for a play his wife was directing. Acting was always something I wanted to try but never had the chance, now the opportunity presented itself. It was a breakthrough moment for me to confront my fear and use it to help me grow in confidence. After that, I had several more chances to act. That put paid to my terror of public speaking. A comfort zone had been smashed.

2. Take small, calculated risks

By calculated risks, I mean doing something that will challenge you to a small degree but isn’t overly threatening. Stepping outside of your comfort zone doesn’t require you to go in boots and all. Do an exercise that is still scary but allows you to confirm that you can pull it off.

I have always loved writing and contemplated doing it as a freelance gig. My confidence was low in this area, but I stepped out and applied for some writing jobs. I started landing them and I was excited. Over the past several years I have been privileged to write for a range of different clients. It was a calculated risk because I still had an income stream to fall back on in case my efforts bore no fruit.

Start by experimenting with new activities such as meeting people outside of your usual social circle. Stick your hand up to volunteer in taking on opportunities you would normally avoid. The small steps you take eventually add up and expand your comfort zone.

When taking action in an uncertain moment, a helpful technique is the 5-second rule, popularized by Mel Robbins in her book of the same name. With this method you stop, count to five before you do anything. That slight pause allows your mind to settle down its noise before you make your move. Each small challenge you take on is like adding a brick to the foundation of a more confident, adventurous version of yourself. So, the next time you face uncertainty, countdown from five and say yes – you never know where it might lead.

3. Building resilience through mindfulness

When you get out of your comfort zone, your mind runs amok with thoughts about how crazy you are and it questions your ability. Then you begin to overthink everything and anxiety kicks in over what could go wrong. This was my mental base camp! However, through mindfulness I learnt how to ground myself in the present moment, reducing the mental clutter that uncertainty can create.

Don’t think that mindfulness will magically make the cognitive noise disappear because it doesn’t. It merely gives you the ability to accept the thoughts and ensuing emotions without judgment. You let them be, knowing that they are temporary, as transient as clouds in the sky.

Concerning getting out of your comfort zone, mindfulness provides you with resilience. This is because it gives you the ability to respond thoughtfully to stressful situations rather than reacting impulsively to them. When you’re mindful, you are better equipped to deal with change, make clearer decisions,  and have emotional balance.

If you have never tried mindfulness before, here are some exercises you can try to get you started:

  • Deep breathing: Inhale for a count of four, hold your breath for four, then exhale for four. Repeat this until you feel calm and centered.
  • Body scan meditation: This is a popular mindfulness practice. Sit in a comfortable position and take several deep cleansing breaths, focusing on each inhale and exhale. Turn your attention towards your body and notice any sensations without judgment, allow these to be. Take your time and when you are ready, return your awareness to your breathing, then continue with your task or day.
  • Mindful journaling: Write down what you are feeling and observe the emotions without being caught up in them. Allow the words to flow through you onto the page uncensored.

Mindfulness reminds us that in uncertainty, the present moment is something within our control. It is the anchor point in which you remain steady against the flow of change. When I moved to a new country, it was mindfulness that kept me calm as I learned to exist in a new culture, and new language, and overcome the longing to go back to my home country.

4. Find growth-oriented communities

Personal growth wasn’t something I had much interest in until I faced major depression and reached out for help. It compelled to to break out of my comfort zone, it was that zone that was responsible for my emotional distress. My life was like Groundhog Day in which each day was identical to the other with no change. I longed for something different but didn’t know at the time how to go about it, so my spiral into depression started and it spun faster and faster.

When you face uncertainty, it’s important to have people alongside you who can help you navigate the waters. It’s best if these people have been through the same situation as you and come through it. The right community can act as a safety net, offering encouragement, guidance, and perspective as you step outside of your comfort zone.

Supportive networks remind you that you aren’t alone in facing your challenges, you have a strong backup team and that can make all the difference. Consider joining groups that align with your values and interests. These provide a space to share experiences, celebrate victories, and learn from each other.

In my case, I got involved in a few groups based on mindfulness, meditation, and spirituality. All are areas that have helped me step out of my safety zone, explore who I am, and transform into a more holistic person. The people I met in these communities are amazing, patient, and unconditionally loving. They have become my support and I am thankful every day to have them in my life.

5. Celebrate the journey

When you are on a road trip, do you ignore the scenery that surrounds you and tell everyone else in the vehicle to do the same? The answer would be “No!”. Part of the trip is enjoying the journey, and having a stop or two along the way before reaching your final destination. It needs to be the same when you take a step out of your comfort zone.

You have your end goal in mind (i.e. your “destination”), but you need to revel in the process (the “journey”) that will get you there. If you aren’t enjoying yourself along the way, you are going to end up quitting and turning back to your old lifestyle and old “you”. Take time to reflect on the progress you have made and congratulate yourself for how far you have come. The forward momentum, no matter how small, is getting you closer and closer to your result.

Setting aside a moment (this can be considered your “pit stop”) to appreciate the courage and strength you have shown in breaking out of your comfortable shell boosts your resolve to keep going. Celebrate in whatever way suits you.

The journey outside your comfort zone is filled with valuable lessons. By embracing the process and honoring every step forward, you build the confidence and resilience to tackle even greater challenges ahead.

From comfort to courage

Stepping outside of your comfort zone is never easy. It takes grit, determination, and tenacity. However, it is one of the most rewarding things you can do for your personal growth. Reframing your fear, practicing mindfulness, surrounding yourself with a great support team, and celebrating each success all aid in fortifying your courage and self-belief.

For those of you who may find this process difficult, start with small steps. Take a tiny risk and do something that will show you that breaking out of your safety net isn’t frightening. Go at your own pace. It’s not a race, but a journey of personal transformation. We all go at the speed we are comfortable with.

With that, here is a challenge for you all: What’s one thing you will do today to embrace uncertainty? Whether it’s speaking up at a work meeting, saying “Hi” to someone you don’t know, or reaching out to someone you admire, take that first step! Growth happens when you dare to move forward, even when it seems frightening. You will find that it wasn’t as scary as you imagined. Your future self will thank you for it.

 

– Brian Simms